Tag Archives: Weight

Weightloss and Comments

Yesterday I got hit with the whole “Are you losing weight because you look like you’re weight” comment.  My response was to look down, mutter “yes,” and walk back to my desk.

This morning, I was going through my e-mails before I got ready for work and saw something one of the vloggers I follow had posted about a woman who had flagged her down and wanted to talk to her about the Overeaters Anonymous group at the flagger’s church.  I shook my head; maybe the woman had had great success there, but to flag someone you don’t know down and interrupt them getting their groove on is a little much.  Unsolicited advice is a no-go.  Just don’t, please.

Over on Facebook, I’m in a couple gastric bypass groups.  Someone in one of them posted about their daughter who was going through the same struggles the person had before coming to terms with having weightloss surgery.  As a parent, she doesn’t want her child going through the same situation she did.  However, her daughter is over the age of 18; there’s not much a parent can do about their offspring’s choices after that.

Something about all of these things brought me to write this particular post this morning.  Here it goes.

PLEASE STOP GIVING ADVICE OR COMMENTING SO MUCH!

Sure, I’ve lost weight.  Yes, I work around people and people are going to notice changes.  No, I don’t constantly want to talk about my weightloss journey and I definitely don’t want to talk about how you’re having surgery because I look like I’m having amazing success with it.  If I’m out here walking or exercising, I’m in my groove; please don’t comment about it.  Or how about asking yourself before saying anything, “Would I say what I’m about to say if this person was a [insert descriptors… for this, it’s ‘smaller person.’  For others, it may be ‘male,’ ‘female,’ etc.]?”  How about that?

In my monthly goal posts, yes, I put up how much I lost the month before and how much I want to lose over the next month.  That’s pretty much it.  I’m not constantly posting pictures for Transformation Tuesday, Weightloss Wednesday, etc., because I am over talking about my weightloss journey.  It’s been seven months!  The only thing I really want to talk about is how to mentally be the smaller person.  Can you talk to me how to mentally not respond to things the way I would have when I was bigger?

*Holds temples*

For people with kids, harping on their weight is just going to make them more self-conscious and insecure in themselves.  If you’re really worried about it, start cooking differently for the whole family.  Go for walks as a family; do activities as a family!  Make it look like you are trying something different as a family.  Don’t make weight the focus.  Why is weight even a focus at that point?

WHY ARE WE SO PREOCCUPIED WITH WEIGHT AND NOT SUPPORT?

Support is different for each person.  Why can’t we say something nice to people regardless of size, race, gender, cultural aspects, etc.?  For my co-worker, just say something nice about my outfit or my hair.  For people we see out on the streets, if you have a moment to say something nice, do so but don’t interrupt them while they are in their groove.  For the parent, encourage your kids to do things with you like game night; communicate with them.  Actually have a conversation with each other where you are supportive and not destructive towards them or yourselves.

Food for thought today.

Listening to:  My Amazon Playlist

Reading:  Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling

Quote of the Day:  “Each of us has lived through some devastation, some loneliness, some weather superstorm or spiritual superstorm. When we look at each other we must say, I understand. I understand how you feel because I have been there myself. We must support each other because each of us is more alike than we are unalike.” ― Maya Angelou

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Filed under Advice Column, Weightloss

Changes and Letting Go

Yesterday was an off day with many of my emotions tied to my weight loss, or lack thereof.  In December, I had weight loss surgery.  I went from brushing up against 400 lbs (highest weight was 396)  maybe nine months ago to flirting with 300 lbs (I was at [enter weight] this morning).  For me, this was difficult to swallow.

It’s been almost fourteen years since I weighed this much.  Fourteen years, I went to Mountaineer Challenge Academy and lost about 70 lbs, getting down under 250 lbs.  I was excited, and I liked how I looked.  It didn’t last, though.  I went to college at 16 and being away from home with no real authority figure there, I binged and did some idiotic stuff.  After two weeks, I went back home, back to my baggie clothes that didn’t fit anymore, went to work and went back to high school.  I tried out for the track team but not having a drill sergeant in your face barking at you to run is different.  I didn’t run and therefore didn’t stay after the first practice.  I gained all the weight back I had lost and stayed the fattest kid in my class.

As an adult, I got down to 322 by walking and doing cross-fit.  Stuff is hard but doing it with other people made it worth it.  After a few months, I stopped.  And like clockwork, within a few years, I was back up to 396.  It hurt that I had let myself get there far gone again, but it was no one’s issue but my own.

The other day, I made a comment on my Facebook about being scared because this is the smallest I’ve been weight wise in a very long time.  I’m scared because this is unknown territory right now.  I’m training for a half marathon, and I want to run it, not fast but at least a good bit of it.  I’m procrastinating on the training though because… I’m scared I’m going to break the treadmill.  I know that is just an excuse but to me, that’s a legit excuse.  It’s cold up here right now, even though tomorrow is going to be in the 70’s.  I have a seven-mile walk/run tomorrow before I go to Pottercon with a friend of mine.

I mentioned all of this to Ray yesterday, and we went shopping for smaller clothes for me.  Granted it was just Walmart but I haven’t been able to wear Wal-mart pants and jeans in a few years.  We got one pair of jeans for me.  I wanted to try on a 24 just for giggles since I can put on the 26’s without unbuttoning them.

Now to clean out our room and donate what we are never going to wear again before we got shopping at Torrid Sunday.

Happy Friday folks.

Listening to:  Back to Chubby’s Past Diets Part 1.

Reading:  Etched in Bone by Anne Bishop

Quote of the Day:  “What would you do if you weren’t afraid?” ― Sheryl Sandberg

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Filed under Advice Column, Weightloss